Till' Further Notice

Ladies and Gentlemen of the beautifully deserted world of "my fan base", I am writing this post to regretfully (or maybe not so) inform you that I will be hearby closing this blog via abandonment effective immediately. I'm sure you all saw it coming, but never the less, I feel I should answer the question before it comes up. The question...

...Why?...

well the answer can be summed up in 3 letters, ADD. Now I'm not saying that I HAVE ADD... but somehow I get the feeling that, just like the moon, it effects me in some way I don't fully understand.

Everyone always says "no matter how busy your day is, you still have at least 5 minutes a day to write something down" and, this is true, except, I'd much rather spend those 5 minutes climbing, or chatting, or pwning some noobs online. Maybe I should of made more of an effort to blog more, but.... I didn't..... so deal with it. Some may say that by abandoning this ironically already forsaken place that I am "taking the easy way out". But then my motto has always been "the easiest way is THE EASIEST WAY" (pretty simple huh, you'd be suprised just how easy it is to live by that motto). So with that being said I will end this final post in a familer way.

BOM BOM BOM YOU GUESSED IT, ITS THE ONE AND ONLY....


THOUGHT OF THE DAY!!!!!

Many people in my life have told me that I'm crazy and that I need to stop and take a good look at my life. To those people I say, if you can see your life... your essence, what ever your telling me to "take a good look at" then YOU sir are the crazy one. Maybe YOU should take a good look in the mirror when you call me crazy. I'll even make it easy for you, and stand inbetween you and a mirror when you say it so that at the exact moment you say "your" I will duck down so that when the word "crazy" exits your mouth you will be looking at yourself, and at the muscles in your mouth moving like eels moving on a fat womans body, wet and slimy and so unappealing it would make you sick. And as you look at yourself, looking back at yourself, you just might reconsiter what YOUR doing with your life. Because I know what your doing with it, your standing in front of a mirror, moving your lips and tongue while simltaniously vibrating the cordes in your throat achieving what early man called "GUHHHHHH" (they spoke something far diffrent then english, but I assume in their language that meant something like "speach"). So think on that the next time you open your mouth, just how stupid you look. How unnattractive your mouth is, flopping up and down, spewing out saliva like the boiling rocks of crakatoa. sending out sound waves like they were tie-dye T-shirts straight out of the 1970's via a time machine hooked up to fusion power, cheap and a dime a dozen. Aside from the time machine and the fusion power generator, which would of cost ALOT. All this to say I've completely lost my train of thought.... ... . dot

I am proving how awesome the PS3 system is by writing this whole post via wifi connected PS3. (all title since I cant figure out how to write normally

Ugh

....... just ugh

For the next 6 hours I WILL NOT MOVE

Wow... you know, having never have done much with my life other then to sit on ass and play video games all day, I must say, I don't think I have EVER been this tired. Its been 13 days so far since my last day off and man, I don't wanna sound redundant, but... IM TIRED. See, remember what I said before in a previous post about my old manager being fired, well my NEW one, or at least my temporary new one, is somewhat of a workaholic, and she likes to make other people work a lot too. So yeah, in other news, I shall never answer my phone again on my day off for as long as I live (watch me break that oath tomorrow, just watch). Its cool though because I think she thinks I'm valuble, which is good, since that probably means I will be getting more raises (she said she doesnt scedule people who arn't valuble and im all over that scedule), The real funny thing is, as I've said before, im extremely tired, and yet, I know I won't go to bed till at LEAST 3AM... COMMON SENCE, YOU SHALL NEVER GAIN A FOOTHOLD IN MY BRAIN!!..........................


.......................... (10 minutes later) well..... I can't think of anything else to say, {[(tired) redundant] yes I do use those math things when I put parenthathies in parenthies}. so, that being said, this post will end... now.

(by the way, this post sucked because I'm TIRED)

Simply Amazing

If only I had four arms, think of all the good I could do

Sure don't wanna miss the month of June

I know I know, I haven't posted anything in FOREVER, and this time sadly I have no good excuse. Well actually, I think its a very good excuse, but you probably wont. Anyway, a lots happened in the past month, so I will get right down to it.

HAPPENING NUMBER ONE.(theres really no need for numbers since this is the only thing that is going to be numbered) I have recently entered a state of employment I had never archived before, and by that I mean, I now have a job (and actually get paid, cool huh?). its not bad, and I can now say (still in the spirit of the previous post) that I am an employ of......Where I make your favorite Cherry Limeaids and strawberry slushes... and blasts... and regular sodas... basically I make anything that is under the jurisdiction of "fountianeer" if thats even a word (so basically I make drinks...). All in all its not that bad of a job, you get free drinks and the works not that hard, except when it gets really busy, sometimes I feel like shooting myself in the foot so I can stop running back and forth (I don't feel like explaining why I have to run while making drinks so I think I wont). The first day on the job was by far the most embarrassing (although I think I am working back to that level of embarrassment, which I will get to later... or not... depends on how much time I have), it started out with me arriving 15 minutes late... yes... on my first day... so as you can imagine, I was in a rush when I went into the bathroom to change into my uniform. I quickly put it on and ran back to the front exclaiming in the most upbeat attitude I could fake "OK! I'm ready to start my training". I was slightly puzzled when my manager responded with "you know your shirts on backwards..." in fact his words didn't even register for a good 2 seconds. Once it finally hit me, and I looked around to see all my future co-workers chuckling either quietly to themselves or in a very obnoxious way, I decided that I needed to fix the problem, so not wasting any time I grabbed the top of my shirt and began to tug upwards all the while thinking "if I can fix it soon it wont be so bad". Now since the shirt was covering my face at the time I was unable to see my managers face when he said "PLEASE don't... don't do that here, go to the back, no one wants to see you take off you shirt here". I can imagine that he must of had a very "disgusted" or dare I say, even "disturbed" look on his face, but actually, not being able to see it worked quite well since, no one on "the outside" could see my face either, which I could bet was bright red, redder then it normally is, and its normally pretty red.
After all the embarrassment was over with I continued with the day, training for what I was told to train for, and calling it a day after all was said and done, or was told to call it a day at any rate. the next day I continued my training under a few people, one of which, who's name I remember clearly NOW, was Dilan (although at the time it was in one ear). He seemed pretty nice, and showed me how to do all the ice creams and such until it was time to go home. The next day I came back and was greeted with "maybe YOU will be our next manager" by one of the employees, to which, I replied with "ehh?" since well, I had no idea what this girl was talking about. At that moment another one of my co-workers came up to me and stated "Boy you missed all da drama" (you can tell shes black cant you... right...), "good" I said "I don't really like drama". Although my statement was true I was still curious about what drama she was talking about was, so I asked her... well... just what you'd think I would ask after reading the last line "what happened?", her response left me with an eyebrow raised, "Dilan just stole $1600 n' split dawg". At that moment what I was thinking wasn't "OH MY GOD' or, "Wow I was in a place that got robbed... SWEET" or even "haha u bi*ches got OWNED" no, what I was thinking at the time was "Dilan..... Dilan..... why does that sound familiar?...... OH YEAH, thats the guy that trained me :)"
(note*) I added the smile because from a bystanders point of view, they would of seen me standing there, with my eyebrows slanted down, thinking very hard, followed by me opening my eyes wide and smiling because I had just remembered something I had forgotten, which is always a good feeling (end note*)
The next day (or the day after, I can't really remember which) they fired my manager. Which kinda sucks, because now we have about 2-4 managers in there daily.... watching us. However its not all bad, one of them happens to be an extreme klutz, and is always falling down and/or spilling ice cream all over her pants... which... well... is funny.

Anyway, its almost 4AM here so I think I had better be off to bed now. I'll try to post more, but I'm not making any promises. Oh and by the way, for those of you wondering what my excuse for not posting was I will tell you now.
I simply don't feel like it, its not that I don't have time or any bull like some other people try to use as an excuse, its simply because, the time I DO when I'm not working (which is about 6 or 7 hours each day) or on my days off, I always want to spend doing other things I want to do, wither its, bike down to the rock gym, play some keyboard, read Japaneses comic books off line... read things.... theres always something I want to do more. So just bare with me and hope that I regain interest in your favorite blog on the whole World Wide Web.
Until next time... umm... yeah...



Advice of the Day: if you ever go to a sonic, oh say one located at 6208 Cameron Rd. Austin TX. 78723, please, don't be that obnoxious ass hole that orders 5 strawberry shakes and 4 Reese's blasts, and if you do, at least order a freakin' hamburger with it, when you don't we have to make that crap in TWO FREAKING MINUTES!



Thought of the Day: Wouldn't it suck if, instead of Achilles heal, it was Achilles scrotum. Because just imagine, if anyone were to ever find out, he would hordes of people trying to...well... hack his sack......... hacky sack............

Why I haven't been posting (Excuses Vs. Reason)

Before I start giving the reasons as to why I don't post, I feel I should tell you how my average day goes first, with (bom bom bom) VISUAL AID!

6:30 AM, my alarm goes off. The very first thing I do is get a bowl of...













Next thing, immediately after that is to take a...



















After that, usually with no time in between I start my...



















once that is done I put my...



















and my already filled out...



















in my...


















and get on my...
















.

I head down the street trying not to end up like...

















as I head to...














err, not that. Ahem. As I head to...















......................... as I head to the place where I am dropping off applications...... (stupid pictures) once I'm all done with that I will usually head off to the














............... no........................















................I swear to god, I don't go there that much...













THANK YOU, I go there (thats why I packed my...


















.
after I'm done...



















I head back. Once back I usually get started on the...



















then move straight to...














where I will spend the rest of my time watching...














which is so worth it. Then basically, I eat...













then watch more...














till I go to...














....(thats bed by the way).... and thats pretty much my day..... but you see, if I were to take time to write my blog more, it would take away a good portion of my...



















or my...



















or my...















time, which, sure its good for you, n' makes you all...



















but it makes me all...

















which is not so good. All this to say, I have my reasons for not keeping my...





's












(figure that one out)
pleased. so until my day starts to slow down a bit, or I feel a need to post something, try to be content with what you get.

(oh and Rosie, yes I am living with...



















in...

Updates (can you spell cliche)

As he lay there on the couch looking through the blinds out the sliding glass door, listening to a song that reminded him of things he hated being reminded of, he pondered all the things that had been happening in his life up until that moment. He watched the trees become clearer with each passing moment, almost as if some big ball of gas and fire that gave off light, burning millions of miles away was coming around the corner (the corner millions of miles away) slowly illuminating everything it touched while simultaneously giving an alien the power to save a made up city and beat a maniacal bald guy on regular basis.

"What have I been up to" He wondered as he stared. He could of written about how he would wake up each day at 6:30, eat his breakfast, do his school, then ride his shiny $400+ bike. How he would pick up 3-5 applications a day on a regular basis, fill them out, and return them the next day, never to get a call back, or a reply to the calls he made. He could of written about how once he was done with his application run he would, quite often, ride down to the local rock gym and build up a sweat and a deep burn in his upper body. Or how when he came back home every day he would be so tired from head to toe all he could do was plop on the couch, flip on whatever was on the TV, and sit there for a half hour as his strength returned. He could talk about how he went cliff diving last Saturday, how he jumped, how he climbed, how he jumped more, and how he climbed more (though he never actually dove, cliff jumping just didn't sound the same). Or he could of talked about the awkward patch of sunburn on his back due to the misplacement of SPF 50 on that same saturday, moments before the jumping. There was so much he could of written about, but being so early in the morning, everything that was there, simply slipped his mind. In defeat, he closed his notebook, grabbed his towel and headed down the hall to the shower.

"Next time" he said, in a voice that made it painfully clear he was lying to himself "I'll post something next time".

This is where we leave our hero, either too busy, too tired, of just not modivated enough to drop by and post an update. A hero amongst the fat and lazy. Trying to find his way through his new life.

But more importantly...

Trying to find the soap.

How My Day Went

Alarm Clock: Beepbeepbeep
Me: ugh, food, *munch munch*
Me: ugh, shower *shower shower*
Shellie (my computer): cough cough, I have a virus
Me: stupid Shellie, today is horrible
Bike: ride me ride me
me:*ride ride ride*
Me: Ugh, job
Application: FILL ME!
Me: *fill fill*
Me: I WANNA GO TO THE ROCK GYM!
Me: *ride ride ride*
Rock Gym: hi Ben, bet you wish you had your shoes
Me: yeah, I WANNA GO DOWN LAMAR STREET
Me: *ride ride ride*
Me: I think I'm bored of Lamar street
Me: I think I'll go home
Comic book store to my right: ENTER ME!
Me: I WANNA GO IN THE COMIC BOOK STORE
Spider man: read me!
Me: *read read read*
Me: bye comic book people
Lamar street: Come further
Me: well I could stop by the Highland Mall, ok.
Me: I must of made a wrong turn, I don't know this place
Park: you remember me right you've been here many times, cut through me!
Me: I WANNA CUT THROUGH THE PARK
Me: humm, I don't want to have to cut through all the people at the whole foods to get to the other side.
Me: I think I will take this road to the right, then turn left, and then left again
Me: that way I can get a drink at the whole foods, turn around, and find the mall
Me: la la la
Car: la la la
Fence: MUAHAHAH
Me: la la la
Car la LA la
Fence: MUAHAHAH 3... 2...
Me: AHHH
Car: AHHH
Bike: FUUUUUU*K


CRRRRRRSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHH!!!


Me: you f***ed up my bike lady
Lady: are you ok
Bike: NOOOOO
Me: I'm fine
Lady: put it in the back, I'll get u a new one
Me: Ok
Me: It wont fit
lady: tie it to that tree
Bike: Oh what the hell!!! your just gonna leave me here?
Car: VROOOOM!
Bike:............ hello?................

lady: we need bike
Bike man: get this bike
Me: I like this bike
Lady: he needs helmet
Me: I guess
Helmet man: get this helmet
Me: I like this helmet
Lady: He needs U lock
Me: well actually I already have a Lock so I don't really...
Lock man: get this lock
Tatoo man: tell me witch car is hers so I can put my bike under it
Me: hey this bike doesn't have a kickstand
Lady: WE NEED KICKSTAND!!!
Kickstand man: sorry we don't have any, but you can come back tomorrow.
Lady: fine, we want to buy all this
Me: wait, how much is all this stuff gonna cost???
Lady: doesn't matter
Cashier man: that'll be six bajillion dollars.
Capitol One Credit Card: WEEEEEEE
Lady: Take bike, go home, stay safe
Me: wow thanks lady, sorry you ran over me, nice meeting you, bye

Me: that was weird, oh well, time to go home
Me: la la la
Fence: MUAHAHAH
Me: la la la
Fence 3.... 2.....
Me: FENCE!!!!!!
Bike 2.0: BREEEAAAAAKKKKKK!!!
Me: *peeks around fence* humm, there wasn't a car this time anyway.
Me: oh hi old bike
Old Bike: huh? HEY HEY, finally, I've been sitting here in the sun for....
Me: gotta go, pick you up later maybe
Old Bike: what! wait wait, DON'T GO......wait wait.......NOOOO...............(muttering)..................MAYBE!?!?!?!? ...........

Home: welcome home
Me: good to be home
Bike 2.0: yeah, just park me right here dawg... cooo
Post: The End.



Disclamer: The only reason I got in a car with a stranger is because I was at least 6 miles from my home, and she had just ran over my bike. I mean what did you expect me to do, CARRY IT BACK?!?

Luckily the lady was really nice, and now, I have a pretty sweet bike, light weight too, so if it happens again, I will have the option of carrying it back (not that I will..... or that it will happen again)

Ideas for this post = El Zilcho

While your mind is still slightly focused on the before mentioned post title I will complete contradict what I said and tell you that I DO have an idea for this post. Schizophrenia. Now, as I have said at least 100 times, your are probably thinking, "but bra (thats surfer for bro, I like to imagine all my readers have some kind of weird speech impediment, and yes, surfer is impediment) why r' u postin' bout schizophrenia dude, like, what's it got to do with u man". Well, it has absolutely nothing to do with me, but did Hitler really have anything to do with WWII? only if you believe everything you are told on the history channel, and if you believe old people who "claim" to have been there. But Hitler is neither here nor there, most likely because for someone to be "here or there" they would have to be somewhere, and to be somewhere implies that you actually exist, and well, I hate repeating myself, I hate repeating myself.

LIKE I WAS SAYING.


Schizophrenia. I'm posting about it because it fascinates me, kind of like how straying off from the topic at hand and rambling on about some random thing such as a WWII villain, or how I stray from topics fascinates me. But thats not the topic at hand, the topic as I said 3 times.... you know.... screw it, you know what it is. I AM POSTING BECAUSE IT FASCINATES ME, AND IF I CAN GET TO LINE TWO WITHOUT STRAYING FROM THE TOPIC I WILL BE FLABBERGASTED.... (Note to self, make next post about the word flabbergasted). Have you ever wondered if maybe you were schizophrenic and didn't know it, as strange as it sounds I have wondered... I have wondered why I've wondered that. See, I have thoroughly studied my brain, and have discovered the most logical path for my brain to take at any given time. So, to put it in idiot terms, or just not "me" terms. I can tell what I am going to be thinking and when. Incredible huh? With that still in mind, by all my accounts I should be wondering if I am really a schizo unknowing every Wednesday at 7:42PM just before thinking of what my life would be like if I were a panda destined to save the Congo from the commies and their heavily accented ninjas. Like I said, by all accounts, it makes no sense. So I am asking you, have you ever thought it? because I sure have (I directly contradicted myself there to see if you were paying attention) *prince power: rewind* (<-- ignore that) So I am asking you, have you ever thought it? because I sure haven't. But thinking about how I've never thought about it sure has me wondering..... WHAT IF I AM REALLY A SCHIZO AND DON'T KNOW IT!!!!



Thought of the Day: People say Leonardo Da Vinchi was a genius, but I don't know. I'm pretty sure he was an artist.

Writers Block..... Again

I don't know exactly if its REAL writers block... more of a... lack of motivation, if you will. Either way, I haven't really felt like posting anything in a while, probably because not much as been happening out of the ordinary. But I guess you don't care about the out of the ordinary, you just want to hear something that has something to do with anything. Soooo.... on that note............ Ummmm......................................................................................




...............................wow......................................... Well I went climbing on Saturday....... But then I do that every week..... twice a week actually, its not much to write home about though. It was fun however, and I was finally able to campus one of the routes, (for those of you who don't know, that means, climbing with only hands, no legs) it was pretty cool. I'm thinking of making a climbing video, purely out of boredom mind you, and maybe a piano video too (same reason) anyway, after climbing we went to Zilker park to go swimming in freezing water for all of 2 minutes. That is, we swam for 2 minutes, we sat there for over an hour, but don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining, in fact it was fun. The Volleyball after that was more fun however, even though I was never on the winning team. I suppose thats what I get for sucking so much at it. Next time will be different, anyway, thats all I'm leaving you with today, I'll come back when this writers block is over..... or you bug me enough.... either way, I never miss a month, never have.


Achievement of the Day: I had an epiphany today, you see, I had a game that needed a CD-KEY, War Craft to be precise, anyway, problem was, the CD-KEY I had was missing 2 digits, so I got an idea. I looked at my keyboard, then looked at the remaining CD-KEY, it seemed that they only used numbers and letters. With that given information I deduced that there were 36 possible keys on my keyboard that could be used, and it would be a combination of 2 of those keys. Using my expert math skills I then deduced that there would be 1296 possibility's in all.... unless I had the positioning of the digits wrong, in which case that would be doubled... meaning 2592 possibility's, but I'm a "glass half full" guy, so I didn't think of that. I tried entering 2 different combinations to see how long it would take me to punch it in, and realizing that it only took about 2 seconds to punch in 2 combinations, I decided to go for it, and try all 1296 possibility's. Anyway, as luck would have it I didn't have to do all of them, in fact I only had to do 134 before I got it right, pretty sweet huh........................I'm gonna go play it now.

READ ME!

I feel unwanted... it seems my blog has been slowly dying. I know you may thinking that because of the fact I got 600 hits in one month, that it is still alive, but I beg to differ. See, as far as I'm concerned, unless you leave a comment, I have no proof you really read anything, you could just be some random person who stumbled here, and that's not good. And the fact that I am avraging about 3 comments per post isn't helping much (as apposed to last year, when I was avraging about 8) So here's my request people, well actually I have two. First of all, to all my dedicated fans, I want you to tell people, I don't care who you tell just tell everyone you know , tell everyone they know to tell everyone they know, to tell everyone they know, to read my blog, but more importantly LEAVE A COMMENT!!



Random (or not so random) Realization of the Day: I guess this makes me an online attention whore...

Victory is Sweet

I don't think I've cheered so hard in a long, long time.


Thought of the Day: I regret to inform you that, dew the lack of thoughts recently, I have decided that I WILL NOT be doing thoughts on every post. Only on longer posts, or just whenever I have something funny in my head.

And this is how I completely disregard everything I was told...

Provocative title no? your probably wondering "what does it mean" well its simple, quite ironic really if I'm using that word right. I suppose it all started a few weeks ago, when I was talking with my sister, somehow we got onto the subject of online dating, she said that she would never online date, and I agreed with her 100%, stating that "I think its completely stupid and would never do it"... You can probably guess where I'm going with this... I feel like I should stop now, but, for those of you with an IQ of under 60, I'll explain....

.... I got a girlfriend, and not just that, I got an online girlfriend. Believe me when I say I had no clue, and was completely unaware till it was too late. honestly, it's like being drunk, you don't really remember what happened the other night, all you know is it did. I don't remember ever saying I would agree to be her boyfriend, in fact, to me it seemed like one moment we were carrying on a normal conversation like normal people, and the very next we were muttering romantic nothings... in Spanish (.....eh.....uh..... yeah). Now I know what you thinking "if you didn't want one, why don't you just break up?" well the answer to that is simple... I don't want to, I actually like her, shes fun to talk to, she makes me feel good, and... well... I just... like her.
All that however is not the most shocking part of it, at least not to me. No the most shocking part is.... well.... I might as well use another story. Actually this story is from just tonight. I was sitting down on the kitchen table... well actually the chair... the computer was on the table... anyway... I was sitting on a chair by the kitchen table when in comes three of my brothers, just back from San Antonio. Seeing me sitting there chatting with people online, I think its instinct for brothers to ask "sooo are you chatting to your girlfriend" in sort of a mocking voice. Now me, trying to think quick, and not wanting to have to explain a whole heap of things replied with a simple "maybe", in a tone that would imply jest, to make them think I was really joking, when really I was only telling a half truth. The most astonishing thing was, just after he said that, for some... random... ironic reason, he said "shes probably like 14".... Once again for those of you with a low IQ I will further elaborate. Yes... she is 14, but I didn't really realize this until it was... "to late" as you could say. I was talking with her and noticed her display picture, I looked at it and the first thing that came to mind was "Woah, that girls cute, and HEY! shes like my age, probably like 17". Now this wouldn't be that weird considering that with all the hormones put in the cows we eat, women are maturing at a much faster rate. What was weird was that she didn't act younger then me either. She acted like... well... like she was older. It didn't hit me till after I already started to like her. I looked at her profile and there, plain as day said "age 14"... yeah.... it was one of those "Wow... I am such a perv" moments... we've all had them. Anyway, even though most of you probably think its weird, I don't really.... I mean comon, my mom is 6 years older then my dad. that would be like me dating a 10 year old, THAT would be weird. Anyway, I'm only posting about it because it was stressing me trying to keep a secret, just to avoid the "disappointed/awkward/creepy glare" that I know I'll get........ Anyway......... there you have it. Oh, also, I think most guys would agree with my reasoning if they saw a picture of her... but if you over 18 that makes you a pedo, sorry, wadda ya gonna do.

P.S. Her sister told me that if I beak her heart she'll break my face..... not sure if that's good or not.

Oh and no, her screen name isn't "sexygirl69" (yeah)



Thought of the day: = Useless Power of the Day (but just today): The mad with the ability to flip light switches on and off and super human speed (powers only apply to lights).

Humm

Do you ever get the feeling that you might be making a huge mistake in some part of your life. A mistake that has the potential to either make you or break you. A mistake that could send you down a road of glee and delight, but could also end up sending you down a road of simultaneous depression and embarrassment?.............

.........Sucks for you, I don't.

P.S. if you were wondering if I was trying to be all artistic with my profile picture by not centering it your wrong, I just wanted a square picture (without my bothers arm and hair in the shot)



Thought of the Day: Did you know that Tuna fish is Satan's AND Hitler's favorite food, next to the tormented souls of the innocent that is.

I added a chat.

See --->

For people who want to talk to me :D
and stuff...

P.S. if you want to talk, just click the thing that is halfway covered (stupid size malfunction) that says set name.... or whatever it say. Its best to get an account, it takes like 0.2 seconds, but you can also just put a name there.


Thought of the Day: I really think I hate Dr. Phil.... I really do

Note to self...

Never get pretend married online to a girl just because she said you were cute and gave you a pretend lap dance. She'll just end up getting a pretend divorce the next day and running off with someone way less "smexy"........


In other news HEATH LEDGER DIED TODAY!!!!...... honestly....... I DID NOT see that coming.



Thought of the Day: OH NO!!! what will happen to BATMAN!!! NOOOOOOO!

Because It Seemed Important...

... Well sorta... actually not really.

Anyway....

I just thought I would let everyone know that, after spending the entire 16 years of my still young life without ever once making a new years resolution, or at least not one I really meant, I finally have.

Though I don't feel like I should tell you what it is, seeing as how its pretty personal, I'm just going to say... its juicy, real juicy... in a very... sad... sad way.

And on that note (but so far off for all who don't know who... err... what I'm talking about. I.E. everyone), *ahem* Please... leave my brain alone, your pink fuzzy heart shaped ninja sword of doom's constant fantasy love slashes at my imagination is causing me to lose focus on things real....

and now... I retire.... Insane.....
HAHAHHAAHAH....ahhhhh


Thought of the Day: last night, believe it or not, I had a dream that I was a midget, and I fell in love with a girl that was half girl half fairy, but she was also sweedish, in her late 40's, and weighed about 115 to 170 pounds (it changed randomly), I later found out that she was a criminal known for taking advantage of midgets and making them fall in love with her, most surprisingly female midgets, ranging from what I could tell about 16 to 25 years old. The funny thing was they were all surprisingly hot for midgets... and naked, they were all naked too, hot naked teen-age midgets... *cough*... anyway, I ended up pretending to like her after I found out about her dirty little secret, but then called the wall-mart security on her, and had her sent away. I think the reason I was the only one out of her midget following to find out about her evil-ness was because I was part leprechaun, just like she was half fairy.... weird huh.........

A New Year

Before you ask the question your going to ask I'm going to answer that question, before you ask it. No, I am not going to post about my Christmas or my New Year's party because frankly thats not any of your business. Also, I have always thought it's rather pointless telling people about all the fun you've had, I think it just bugs people. Instead, I am going to make a list. A list of ESSENTIALS, for next years Christmas party\ New Years party.

Item Number 1. Mop. A mop will come in very handy if you have small children around who like to make messes.

No. 2. Bucket. At most party's there are plenty of guests, and plenty of guests means plenty of cars. Don't you think it would be great to have a bucket that everyone could put their keys into. That way no one would have to wast time looking for their keys, they'll know just where they are

No. 3. Padding around the Toilet. If you're anything like me you know just how painful it can be sitting on a toilet without foot padding, if you have anything from a stubbed little tow to a nasty bunion its a must. Also the guests will love it, and want to come back for future party's.

No. 4. Laundry Soap. Nothing stains that red and green sweater like Eggnog, and theres no greater annoyance then not being able to wash it out right away. So make sure you have plenty on hand.

No. 5. Low Beds. My motto has always been safety first, and if there is one thing bunk beds aren't, its safe. Make sure that if someone falls asleep at the party from all the filing food (sometimes thats all it takes) put him on one of the low beds, so that he won't accidentally roll off and hurt his jaw and have to walk around for the next three days thinking to himself "why the hell does my jaw hurt so bad?"

And last but not least, the most essential thing in any party is a healthy supply of tomato juice, theres nothing better to start the new year off with a big heaping plate of blueberry pancakes and a nice big glass of tomato juice, yum.

Oh and is it to much to ask for a car with decent shocks? I almost hurled twice in that fricken' thing.


Thought of the Day: I put the "meister" back in Jagermeister... as in, "oh that class clown is such a.... cool meister".... or, or, "Pimp Meister"............. Yeah.

Me Vs. You

In the mood of stupidity I think that today I am going to show everyone just how drastically differently I think then most people.

We'll start with some random small things

Inanimate objects- One thing about me that is very different then most normal people is my view of inanimate objects. Where one person would see leaf, falling gently from a tree hight above, I see a "Wind Ninja" fluttering down silently, passing and flipping through the air, ready to strike his mortal enemy, the grass, with vicious fury. Now you may be thinking "oh well I guess that makes the leafs the bad guys right, because the grass is so soft and nice and pretty. Well see, thats how I'm so different, Instead of seeing a green utopia in an open field I see the product of millions of dead leafs, cut up and mulched by the grass, for food. You may not think that a little wind ninja could do much against the sheer numbers of their pleasantly colored foes, but thats what makes them so extraordinary. A leaf will lay on a blade of grass for hours, days, even weeks, it will stay as long as it has to to make sure that whatever is below it wont live to see spring, I.E. wither and die. Anyway, it hasn't looked very good for the leafs as long as Ive been alive, but hopefully with the support of more people we can let the graceful wind ninjas sore the skies again like they did before the grass came about.

Contact me in comments if you'd like to make a donation.

Video Games- See, most people wonder why I "waste" most of my days playing video games all day. They look at it and see a time waster in a box with pretty pictures, but what I see is so much different. I see subjects of my will, pixels that will follow my commands with a mere thought and twitch of thumb. The video games do what I want, they provide me with the pleasure that only a select few dictators could have ever felt, and in return I give them a place to live, I keep then in better condition then any other person alive could, I make sure that their booklets have all their pages, without even a bend or tear. It is a truly symbiotic relationship, but most people cant see that, they simply call me addicted. Well you know what, I'm not afraid to say that yes, I am addicted to my little friends, and I'm not ashamed of it, because I know that their more then just games... they're an oppressed creation, looked down on as being a "time waster", and I am just a person who cares and who wants to give them a good home.
If you'd like you could contact me in comments and leave a donation, with just a couple of dollars from everyone I could give a hundred video games a new home, where they would be loved and cared for.

Anyway, theres a LOT more I could go on about but looking at the last post I don't really want to make this post super long, so I'll stop here. Until then I just what to say that I hope I sent a good message to everyone about the leafs and the video games of this country, and how they are being oppressed and abused. So next time you go to buy an ice cream or a little orphan boy, just think, is there something better I could be doing with this money.

Call me if you make the right choice


Thought of the Day: I think it would be fun to tie a weight to a duck and throw it off a bridge, that way, you can yell out "Duck" and everyone can have a good laugh.