Paranoia vs Protection

There are 10 things in this world one should avoid in order to stay alive, and these are them.
*note* I realize that in reality there really are more then ten, but I believe that these are the ten most urgent things, the ten things you should ALWAYS be looking out for

10. The first thing you should avoid to ensure your longevity are prom queens. I have seen enough dorky teen comedies in my day to know that they can be deadly with those flowers and bitchy remarks

9. GOOGLE BLOGGER!!!....... AHHHHHHH

8. Spastic fits of rage where you lose consciousness only waking up to find yourself rubbing your nipples. These can be very bad in the wrong crowds, namely gay bars.

7. Dreams.... where you wake up to find yourself rubbing your nipples. Ok so its not lethal but it can still be rather bad *cough* check your sheets if you don't believe me

6. Blankets/sheets/underwear featuring Batman. it may sound stupid but if your sheets ever did come alive batman would be the LAST person you would want to have to wrestle to the ground.

5. people who use cursive WHILE TALKING! Its more dangerous then you think just because of the fact its never happened before, who knows what would happen if it did. For all we know the universe could crumble, I don't really want to find out myself.

4. www.wekillyou.com, the name alone not only suggests caution, but invokes curiosity and stupidity, especially among stoners.

3. People who say their a sex machine. Well think of it this way, if they were built for sex who knows what else they could of been built for, possibly, MURDER! perhaps. They might not even know it either, maybe its in their programing to not know they’re killers, and then just when you least expect it... BAM! you die during the best sex ever.

2. Kevin Bacon....... he freaks the S*^$ out of me

and 1. Well, this ones kinda gonna be a tough one to tell you, but it needs to be said, so ill just say it..... look to the person next to you.......


Thought of the Day: The Lifetime network has shown us that if you’re a girl there’s a 100% chance that the person sitting next to you will rape you, and if you’re a guy there’s a 100% chance that the girl sitting next to you will kill you for cheating on her... sucks huh