Acrobatics

Ok for all of you who saw the post of me doing a hand stand, that was an accident, I was trying to get it as my display picture and it took forever and I guess I forgot to delete it. Stupid thing always says I'm doing something wrong "contains more then 50 KB" "contains invalid characters" "its to long" its a stupid picture and blogger doesn't think you should have it as your display"... Jerks. Anyway it inspired me to post a... Post, about acrobatics. Its really quite amazing and fun if you know how to do it, practicing your ability to do a spinning handstand or an areal (a handless cartwheel or side flip) is something that I truly enjoy, and yes I do have some very gay looking pictures of it, it seems every time Amy hit the "take picture button" I was in just the wrong position, in fact the only really cool looking one is this one
Oh yeah, now there's a keeper. The only problem with hand stands (one hand or two) is I can only hold it for about 2 seconds. My next picture for you is me in the middle of what is called the butterfly, otherwise known as, jumping into the air, laying flat, and spining, it really looks quite cool if perfected. Umm..... Yeah...... That's me...... And as you can see...... I look like a cat.... Or a person.... Like somekind of..... Cat... Person... huh. And Last but not least we have me about to pull of a said flip thingy. Just picture in your head everything going right, I land it perfectly with a perfect spin, and that is probably the polar opposite of what really happened. Well that's all I have for you in my "stupid looking acrobatics" file. Maybe next time i can film myself breakdancing or performing a slap dance to "The hand that feeds".


Thought of the day: If you find a way to make a death cocktail taste like a cocktail you let me know, Because I'm sick of these metaphors.

I Had a Bad Day

Today had to be one of the most annoying days of my life, I woke up and everything was going great, it was one o'clock in the afternoon and I felt very rested despite the fact that I was up till three the previous night downloading songs. I went to the living room, (or the center of my trailer sense its basically just a living room with a toilet) poured myself a bowl of cereal, and hit the play button on the Tivo thingy to play Family Guy. After about an hour I felt like listening to some music so I went to my computer as I always do and opened "Musicmatch Jukebox," it was working fine at first, I added a few songs to the play list when all of the sudden, something popped up saying it was upgrading the program. Now usually before you can do anything it asks if you want to upgrade it and I usually say no but this time it didn’t give me that option and just decided to do it on its own. As it was downloading I realized that I didn’t want to upgrade it so I hit the cancel button because I figured "hey they wouldn’t have a cancel button it messed up your settings," BIG MISTAKE! As soon as it exited I tried clicking on the Musicmatch shortcut but as soon as I did a message popped up saying that it couldn’t find Musicmatch jukebox anywhere on the computer, after about an hour or so clicking on numerous shortcuts and using the search a few hundred times I realized that it had vanished completely from the computer. As you can imagine I was pissed, that was about 6 hours of awesome songs from bands such as Disturbed, Linkin park, Salt of earth, Breaking Benjamins, STEM, Three days grace, AFI, GreenDay and many others. I tried for about another 30 minutes to find the file but it would not open, I even tried taking the computer BACK IN TIME! the whole time I was angrily screaming and punching the walls it was growing increasingly windier outside, right at the peak of my anger it starts raining and Amy looks outside to find that the satellite dish had fallen over meaning I would have to spend about an hour trying to find a signal the size of a pin head. At this point I was afraid I was going to put a hole in the wall so I decided to cool off in the shower. I got my toiletry bag, grabbed a towel, and walked angrily in the pouring rain to the shower, and to top it all of when I got there was an old person sleeping in a chair, I opened the door and woke him and for some reason he laughed at me. When I got into the shower all hell broke loose, violently I kicked the wall as hard as I could... I felt much better *thinking* although it probably would of been more pleasurable to kick the old person laughing at me. Anyway the day turned out not to be so bad when I found out that it wouldn’t take so long to move my music, though I’m still pretty pissed that the musicmatch broke. And in a less related note setting up the satellite didn’t take quite as long as I had expected.

Thought of the day: If super dog is smarter then Einstein, imagine how smart super Einstein would be... now that’s something to think about.

Geezers

Old People make me angry.


Thought of the day: accusing someone of "future rape" isn't a good way to get laid.

Gulf Shores

Ahh gulf Shores Alabama, a beach of fat sweaty tourists, and 30 story condos, but more importantly its a beach of water, and any beach with water is a beach good enough for me (all comedic insults aside it's actually a pretty nice beach). I went to this beautifully crowded beach not but a week ago to spend a day of relaxation and funn-ness and this is what came of it.
We started off swimming which was pretty fun, although all we were doing really was attempting to ride the waves back to shore over and over. After about an hour of doing that you can imagine that I was in need of... Relieving myself, so I had an ingenious idea... (your gonna need to tilt your head for this one, my stupid picture loader thingy sucks) THIS! Its my sand-o-let portable toilet which I didn't use because I didn't actually have to go, yeah, I lied. Anyway after that we thought we would eat a bit of food, at least I think it was food, who knows what was in those hot dogs my brother made. After that we decided to do some beach fishing, and by we I mean my brother of course. I'm not quite sure but I think I've seen that photo somewhere else, like in the Science books when it's talking about neanderthals or something like that. While everyone (and by everyone I mean my brother again) were fishing me and my sister were feeding the sea gulls near a large puddle. As we were feeding the fish my sister pointed out that there was a big fish in the puddle (it was actually only about a foot long) so we decided to catch it with nothing more then a plastic bag and a body ugly enough to scare the fish into it, yup, it was a team effort. They didn't believe we caught it with a plastic bag until we told them the fish was in a puddle, then they kinda laughed... Anyway here's the fish, isn't it cute. After that I tried my hand at sand castle building and I think I did pretty good, that mind you is the first attempt, the water kinda destroyed half of it so I told Amy she could sit on it which she did without hesitation. This masterpiece however I did not let Amy sit on, this was my crowning achievement, and it even has trees. Lets all take a moment to bask its awesome glory................ Yeah.......... That's good........... Anyway I'll end my story here, mostly because that's basicly all that happened on my trip to the beach... (thinking) all except for when I put Amy's head in the sand and it came out looking like the Reaper.

Thought of the day: If your thinking about selling your soul don't only think about the devil, I'm sure there are lots of other people out there who are interested in it, or you could try Ebay.